Wednesday, June 30, 2010


What if you were to wake up one day, and find out everything you've experienced all the years before, were just one giant dream? What if tomorrow, or any time right now, really, you just wake up, and you're suddenly in a different bed, different house, different family, different everything?

I've always pictured it like this : 
It's a normal day, I'm doing my thing. Maybe I'm out with friends, or family, or at a party or something. Anywhere with a lot of people. We're all having fun and enjoying ourselves. Everything is like it is now. Then late at night when we're all still hanging out wherever we are (movies, mall, party, friends house, anywhere) something bad happens. Like I walk across the street and get hit by a car or someone attacks me or I fall and hit my head really hard. And just before anything gruesome actually happens, as in the last thing I see are headlights and a horn blaring, or the ground before I fall, or the attackers eyes, I wake up. And everything's different. Perhaps I was in a coma? I think that'd be it. I heard a while ago that people who are in comas can still hear what you're telling them. That could definitely help with everything that happened in my head. Maybe I heard them say something and as they left, I started dreaming in my little coma and made a whole scene of it. Like an alternate reality? I don't know what to call it. There's a lot of maybe's here. 

I've thought about this idea many, many times, throughout my life. That just maybe I could wake up any second and my "real life" is completely different. I think I got this weird idea in my head when I was in elementary school. Third or Fourth grade, maybe. Because one day I did wake up, and I suddenly just forgot everything previously, or the majority of it. I sat up in bed, and I recognized my house, I knew my name, my age, my friends names, family, I recognized all of it. But for some reason, I couldn't remember much else. If someone told me something, I could remember that. But I just woke up, and didn't remember any events. 

So, why not have it happen again? But this time, everything I know right now is really not reality? You have to admit, it'd be a pretty epic experience. 
But what bothers me is that if I ever do wake up and I indeed was in a coma, I'd miss so much of my life. Or maybe not, people have been in coma's for only a week. But since I know so much of this life, what if I forget everything in that life? What if I found my soul-mate, and didn't remember him at all? What if I was actually in my adult years, 30 or so, and had kids? What if my reality now, who I am, my friends, what I think, is actually completely different than who I "really" am in my "real" life? What if I was a stuck up snob who had no originality? Ugh I'd hate that! Hmm, maybe this could just be an epiphany? A slap in the face by nature saying I need to stop being such a bitch! Haha, I don't know.

I think, that if it were all true and this is all fake, that I'd miss this life more than I did my real one (unless, of course, I remembered everything again). And it kind of scares me that I could so easily lose all I have now. My friends, mostly. I love my friends. My family annoys the hell out of me, but I think I'd miss them some too. 

Would my "real me" change? Would I try to be who I am now? Would I just be like "wtf was that shit?" and laugh and return to normal? What would I do? Who would I be? Maybe I don't know who I am now, maybe I'm all made up. But, damnit, I'm happy with my made up self. 


  1. Have you ever experienced a lucid dream?

  2. No I have not :[ I've always wanted to.

  3. That is my essence of happiness; the fact that i'm happy with myself, and my actions and personality are next in line to make that up.

    Just maybe those comparisons between the real you, and the made up you, are there so you know that what you are in this conscious moment, is truly what you want to be. After all, who really wants to be a stuck up snob with no originality? :]

  4. Haha that's a good way of putting it. And yeah that'd suck to be a snobby person D:

  5. Have you ever heard of the Rabbit's Dream?

    That everything that exists, the entire universe, all the matter that matter that matter, it's all part of a rabbit's dream?

    and that when the rabbit wakes up, everything is suspended for a while, and then the rabbit starts dreaming again, and we appear once again?

    i mean, how do we know that the table in the living room doesn't just disappear when we're not in the room? if we can't see it, is it still there?

    okay sure, physics laws whatever. "it can't just disappear" okay.

    but yes, i think about this a lot too.

    sometimes, when i'm dreaming, i'm sooo sure that it's real, that it's my life, whether the dream is good or bad. then i wake up, and i realize how different it was to my actual life tho at the time, i was completely oblivious.

    hey, did you watch inception?!


    okay, getting off topic.

    i'm loving your blog, so i'm browsing through all the posts.

    i'm no stalker :3 i'm just an avid reader!

    (and maybe 20% stalker...)


  6. I've never heard of the Rabbits Dream, but when I was little, I even told my mother the EXACT SAME THING!! Just with some sort of other being or something. That we were all just part of someone elses dream, and when we went to sleep was when they woke up. and when THEY went to sleep, we woke up. How weird is that! I came up with the same concept when I was a wee lass :]

    And no, physics my ass. I love thinking out of the box. I used to think my toys came alive when i left the room or slept when I was little ;]

  7. And YES I did watch Inception!!! It was freaking amazing.


You're already at the end of the post, the big white box is right there, so empty and lonely, why not leave some love? :)