"The internet is about people connecting to people, wheather for business, politics, or socializing; that's something we've all been doing since long before the Internet existed. The real accomplishment is to make those connections so versatile and different that they create a social network that not only reflects your life, but expands it." - Craig Newmark
Lately, I've been felling completely unsocial.
I scroll through my Facebook newsfeed and I can't find one person I want to talk to. I can't find many people who I want to call my "friend" anymore. I can't think of anyone who I have anything in common with.
Though there is a couple; those are the ones who I've met online, through Blogger. I love those guys best, they're such a fun mix of people from all over the world. Sadly, they all live in different countries or states from me.
Is it weird that I feel closer to people who I've never physically met, than the people who I know in person and used to hang out with?
Other than Mike, of course. Anyway.
If I could, I would go throughout my Facebook and delete everyone but a handful. But I don't. Why don't I? I don't care for those people anymore. I don't know why I don't. I guess I don't want to have only 15 people on my friendslist.
So that's why I have a G+ account! I can have my own little group of fun people on there.
I'm a terrible person, I know.
See, I'm an introvert. I'm not afraid of people, I just prefer to not talk to the random person next to me. I don't like to pretend to be extremely nice for the sake of being "polite". Unlike normal people, or extroverts, I feel a weird squeezing feeling when people I don't know try to talk to me. I'm overcome with the urge to smile and laugh more than I usually would, try to keep the chit-chat going, like a "normal" person would. Try to respond to everything they say, with more than just a giggle.
But I can't. I giggle and try to be polite, but in my head I'm yelling "please stop talking to me, please!! I don't know what else to say to you, I have nothing to contribute."
I'm weird, I know. I'm not like this all the time, just... the majority of it. I always feel as if I have to be overwhelmingly nice to people I don't know well. Hell, even with my "friends". They're all so uber nice to each other and shit, and I just can't be that nice. I'm a nice person, but I will not shower you in compliments and give you girly-best-friend-cheek-kisses. I will not playfully lay on my friends, or flop down on their bed and open their books. I won't eat their food unless it's offered to me.
I just can't do that.
I don't know what it is, I just don't like talking to people.